Good Old Friends.

I know a lot’s happening in the AI world these past few days. I have a few thoughts, but I’ll save them for another time.

Today I want to write about some old friends.

My freshman year college roommates have been two of my best friends for the past 8+ years (I can’t believe it’s been that long). We’ve done many crazy stupid things, long road trips, late nights, all of that.

We were all very close, even after moving out of the dorms and into separate apartments. We’d still get together regularly for beers and talk about work and life and sports and ambitions and everything that fills the in between.

Eventually after graduation each of us left Minnesota in succession for bigger and better. Brandyn went to Tampa, Joel to LA then NYC, and me to Chicago.

And, like many friendships no matter how close, over those years we stopped connecting as much. It was hard to stay connected from so far away. It’s funny how much proximity determines your closest relationships over the short term. Eventually we’d hardly hear from each other at all.

That is until last year.

At the beginning of last year we decided to start doing a Zoom call at the end of each month. We called it our Monthly Board Meeting.

We’ve kept a running doc for each meeting with an agenda of things to discuss and notes from the conversation. Almost like a dumb little friendship diary. A peek:

Monthly Board Meetings

We talk about everything and anything. Current events. Favorite BBQ Wings. Sports bets (lost my Vikings super bowl bet this year..). Dumb Business Ideas. Life Updates. You name it. We drinks a few beers and have dumb stupid fun with it like only good friends can.

Some times we play the online version of Catan (Brandyn is ranked top 1,000 currently). This month Joel moved to New York so we spent most of the time hearing about it and getting a 5-sec virtual tour of his tiny apartment. Sometimes others hop on as well.

Usually we’ll all join from our laptops and hangout for an hour or two. Other times it’s a 30min FaceTime from the car. But we always make a point to do it and take notes for things we want to talk about ahead of the next one.

And ultimately I think that’s the important part. Intentionality and Consistency.

Sure it’s good to have many friends. You should have lots and lots of friends, life is better that way, we are social creatures.. But outside of your family, the best relationships you can have are your good old best friends.

People who have known you from kid to adult, through many big life events and ups and downs. Those are the relationships worth cherishing because they are the people who you can be the most yourself around. The most vulnerable with. You need those.

And I think as you get older, especially from about 25-35, it becomes really easy for those strong friendships from your younger years to fade. Many folks end up really lonely in their 30s and beyond, in large part because they aren’t intentional and consistent about staying connected.

I say you should do everything you can to cherish your good old friends. Because one day if you’re not careful they may not be there. And part of your former self will fade away.

Staying connected doesn’t have to be hard or tiring, or expensive like some extravagant Caribbean vacation. It can be as simple as a monthly Zoom or phone call.

So call a friend.

Send them a note or an old photo when you think of them.

You’ll be better off because of it.

Peace,
Ramsey